Satisfied

Hi guys!
   It's been way to much time between my last post and now. I am not even going to attempt the catch up game. However, I will tell you that my trip to California was awesome! It was so refreshing to see so many friends/family. 6 out of the 14 days there were work work work but it was still well worth it!
   The one thing I appreciate the most about my trip home was that it helped me to realize how blessed I am to be living in OK. God knew I needed a new direction to head in and He sent me down the perfect path. I am so satisfied with my life right now. Even though not much has changed about my life pattern from CA to OK, there is just something different about being here with all newness around me. It has really helped me appreciate being alone and leaning on nothing but God. I have been doing things that I enjoy with my spare time (which is pretty much only on the weekends) instead of sitting around feeling sad. It's an awesome feeling! Cooking, cleaning, shopping, drinking coffee, playing with my puppies and so much more consume my time now and I love every minute of it.
   Anyways, I don't really have all that much to blog about (well, the reality is there is too much since the last post) other then to tell you all, there is so much to be thankful for! Enjoy your families and all the lovely smells this time of year brings.
MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone!

Anger, Disappointment and Hurt

Ephesians 4:26-32
26 Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,
27and do not give the devil an opportunity.
28He who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need.
29Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.
30 Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.
32 Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.

All the time in the world due to lack of sleep...

    I can't believe it's been 5 weeks since i last updated my blog. We'll chock that up to how busy life has been!
    I'm finally getting to be the social butterfly you all know and love, again! God has been blessing me with some truly amazing new friends (and reconnecting with old ones) here in the great state of Oklahoma. For that, I am insanely grateful! My social calander has included at least one event every week and busy busy weekends!
    Sooooooo many things have happened since I last wrote! For starters, I will tell you about August at a curriculum company. Can you say PURE INSANITY?! Yep, that about sums it up. You can only imagine how many calls the four of us in customer service had to take to provide the shipping dept with up to 300 orders in one day! Granted, not all of these were phone orders (thank goodness for our website!). *whew* Let's just say after 2 1/2 months of that, we are all very grateful to be entering the "slow season."
    During all of this madness I was still living it up on the weekends with a canvas/paint/mog pog party, church, worship team, cleaning, shopping, discovering new places (like utica square, an adorable out door shopping mall) a house warming party, pretending to learn how to coupon, coffee dates, movie nights....etc. Such is the life of a happy little butterfly!
    Once the "busy season" started coming to an end I was able to attend a weekend get away with the church family at New Life Ranch. NLR is a lovely Christian camp that sits right on the boarder of OK/AR. It was rainy the entire weekend, but, I loved it! The rain made it really feel like fall! An awesome thing about this side of the "world" is that rain doesn't make life come to a screeching halt like it does in California. Activity keeps happening outside even when there is "wet stuff falling from the sky!" Who would have thought?!
    Due to the continuation of outside life during the rain, I was able to learn how to shoot! I also bounced the volley ball around, watched people play soccer and watched other people swim and kayak, all while drinking coffee. Also, during the weekend, Joel led worship and I sang with him, which was really awesome. It was such a blessing to get to know people from the church better since I was still feeling a tad bit out of place. All in all, a really fun time!
     Last but not least, Doug and Amy (amazing couple from church) invited me and a few friends to the Tulsa Shock womans basketball game on Thursday. Afterwards we went to an Irish "restaurant" (aka pub) for dinner. So.much.fun! It is so lovely getting to know the place I call home a little bit better each and every day!
    Next on the agenda? Saturday, 4 friends and I are hopping in my car and driving to Dallas for the day to see MY ANGELS play the Rangers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We also plan to hit up in n out and trader joes! Can.not.wait!!!!!!
     All of that to say, thank you for praying for me as I settle in to my new life. Things are finally coming along and Tulsa is truly starting to feel like home! I Miss you all so much!

Loving life because of His grace and mercy,
Sarah

Shut up!

That's right, I said (cover your ears children) "SHUT UP!" Who exactly am I talking to when I say this? Well, I'm talking to myself. I have spent the better part of the week whining, complaining and crying. I seriously got so frustrated at one point that I wanted to completely give up on life. Then, God got my attention. He basically told me to "shut up." I love it when God is blunt with me because I normally need that. All I ever whine, complain and worry over is finances and men. Two things I have no control over. So I need to once and for all leave it at the cross and trust my Jesus who never stops amazing me with his loving kindness and provision. Are my problems solved? Nope. Do they need to be? Nope. This being because (reality check) GOD IS BIGGER AND HE CONTROLS MY LIFE. The end.

That moment...

when all you can do is stare at the wall and cry....
I can't even imagine what might happen.

Hope

   I just love the word "hope." It is so optimistic and happy! When I feel "hopeless" I am usually not happy, in the slightest. Unfortunately, hope and I have not been the closest of friends lately. Stress, frustration, loneliness and worry have all been making me feel pretty "hopeless" in the last few weeks.
   Today as I was reading through all of the blogs I have missed in the last week or so, I ran across this one. This is my friend Andrea. She is the wife of my friend Paul, who, I grew up with. I just love this girl! She is my living example that there is "hope" for my future! In her blog, she was talking about her divorce (nine years ago) and how she doesn't really talk about it anymore and thinks about it even less these days. The reason for this being that she is now happily re-married (to my friend) and has two adorable children (SERIOUSLY cute kids!)! I can't wait to be in her shoes! The day when I can say "Wow, I haven't talked or thought about my divorce in a long time" is going to be a happy day. It is still on the for front of my mind often times. Sometimes I am really hard on myself and think "OH MY GOSH!!! Will you get OVER IT already?! It's been 3 and a half years and you still act like it only happened a year ago!" Then I see people like Andrea and hope becomes my friend again.
    Another good point she made is that "everything happens for a reason." I tell myself this all the time and I know it is true but often I don't REALLY believe it. Those days when I sit alone in my apartment and think "Will my arms ever be full again? Will I ever get to hold someone and have them hold me in that sweet embrasse of people who innocently love each other? I mean REALLY love me and not just pretend?" I KNOW the answer to that question but reminding myself of it can be quite the problem sometimes. But, then, I remember people like Andrea. Everything DOES happen for a reason and God REALLY DOES know what He is doing! So these are the times when I live in the moment and remember that God is growing me every step of the way. I look back on how far I have come so far, keep walking and try to find Joy in the Journey (not to steal my own blog name or anything ;)). I also remind myself of things like the fact I learned this week: it can take two to FIVE YEARS to heal from a devastating event in your life! Crazy huh?!
   The funny thing that strikes me even now, as I type this blog, is that God really does know what He is doing. I mean, I have been desperate and in need of a good reminder that everything will be ok. Man, does God deliver or what?! Not only did He give me Andrea's blog, but in church the last few weeks we have been talking about Ephesians 5. Ephesians is my favorite book of the Bible. I love this book for many reasons. The chapter that can really sting though is chapter 5, especially verses 22-33. Those verses were read at mine and Jeremiah's wedding. They meant a lot to me. As was stated in church this morning, "Marriage without these verses is SCARY stuff. It will either end in devastation or divorce, or both." This was made VERY obvious in my life seeing as how I lived through the "both" of that statement. It is still a source of "hope" even though it stings, A LOT. The "hope" comes from knowing that I now KNOW what to look for. Something my daddy has always said to me that was also brought up in church this morning is to "find someone who loves Jesus more then you and you will know that you have found someone worthy of marriage."
   Another thing that gives me "hope" is that Jesus has been using me and my story to give hope to others. There is someone that I have had the chance to share my story with who needs hope right now. She has been able to find hope through the story that Jesus has been writing with my life. I never get tired of telling my story. Every time I tell it I am reminded of the hope that my story has so far and the hope that there is for the future.
   So...here I sit, living by the hope that I find in stories like like my friend's story (and often, my own). All I need to do is keep reminding myself that there is hope in the story Jesus is writing for my future.
   Well friends.....I'm off to find Joy in the Journey.

Oklahoma Sky

I'm not gonna lie, I love the Oklahoma sky. ;-)  here is some instagram love for you all.